Wednesday, February 9, 2011

So Hot (and Cold) Right Now

Pretty much everyone in the country has been bitching about how miz the weather is wherever they are. And why wouldn't they?? It's colder than the shoulder Kyle from "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" gave to her own sister Kim all season long!

I figured if we're all gonna be trapped inside with people that annoy us, pets that we're allergic to, laundry we haven't done, and the harsh realities that Toddlers and Tiaras 5th season is coming to end, we might as well start to develop some new obsessions. I literally can not think of a more opportune time to become addicted to something. If you can, you're probably a meth addict. No judgment.*

Here are some of the obsessions I'm cultivating while I continue to not freeze my ass off.

*Actually, lots of judgment. Dear GOD, have you seen meth face???

1. Hair Flairs

It's not just for 12-year-old girls circa 1997; now everyone can add individual strands of glittery "flairs" to their hair. Okay, maybe not EVERYONE. This look is definitely a little despy for the over-35 crowd. And yes, Adrienne Maloof was wearing them the entire season of TRHOBH. Thank god I'm still young enough to pull this look off!! And beautiful, let's not forget very, very beautiful.

I'm going to Vegas with a few girlfriends next month and I will 100% be wearing these. I especially like that you can do them yourself without any special equipment and that they come out after a few days.

2. Dexter on Netflix

Okay, I realize Dexter has been on TV for like, a thousand years, but my schedule DVR is always jam packed with such choice programming as Glee, Barefoot Contessa, and RuPaul's Drag Race. I simply don't have enough time to get through every show that looks mildly appealing.

However, after reading how much Meg O. loves her some Dexter (like, literally, named-her-cat-after-the-guy obsessed), and Kyle figuring out that the Netflix he streams over Playstation has the first 3 seasons of Dexter, I figure this is the perfect time to add something new to my repertoire.

I just want everyone to know that I did something similar with "Lost" last summer. Like, legit, watched the entire series in 3 months, only AFTER the series came to an end. You may call it "behind the curve", I call it efficient. Me: 1, You: 0.

Anyway, we just got through the first two episodes and I'm already hooked. But let's face it, I like any show featuring a hot male lead and lots of food talk.

3. Planning out different recipes I want to try and then not actually doing it.

Image via Food Noveau

That looks so good, right?? Yeah, I's one of the many recipes I've favorited on Foodgawker with the intention of aligning the stars juuuuuuuuuuuust so in an effort to not only make it, but make it perfectly, and, by the way, take pictures that will put ALL other pictures EVER to shame with my new camera in the most perfect natural sunlight, and, inevitably, be selected by the elusive and hard-to-please editors of Foodgawker, at which point my blog will eclipse the likes of Perez Hilton and The Huffington Post and ultimately take charge of all things "blog", because, ya know, it's my destiny and whatever.

Unfortunately, I just haven't had the time. 'Cus like, I'm too busy with obsession number two, y'all. JK, but I haven't been cooking as much in the last couple of months, which is a damn shame. This must Or maybe tomorrow. I 'unnno.

4. Bridesmaids, the movie

In what is likely to become my favorite movie all time, Bridesmaids is about to break the stereotype of female-led comedies. I don't exactly know what said stereotype is, but I'm pretty sure it's that women aren't as funny as dudes. I'm 98% certain this is a stereotype perpetuated by men...I'm leaving a 2% margin of error for the non-humanoid  marketing mokeys over at Groupon (their sense of humor is questionable, to say the least).

So yeah, okay, this movie was directed by Judd Apatow (the dude that brought us 40-Year-Old Virgin and The Hangover), BUT it was also co-written by SNL's breakout talent of the 2000's, Kristen Wiig. And the fun doesn't stop there!! Throw in a dash of the improv genius of Wendi McLendon Covey, a sprinkle of Maya Rudolph's ridiculousness, and a generous dollop of Melissa McCarthy (Jenny McCarthy's cousin, nbd) and you've got a recipe for cinematic genius that will likely make you quite literally poop yourself from laughing too hard.

I've probably watched this preview (and all of the linked videos) about 84 different times, and ya know what? I laugh equally hard each time. Each and every time.

5. Pressuring my boyfriend to move in with me
I swear to god, it's not desperate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, what are you doing to keep yourself from dying a slow, miserable death of boredom in this icy cold weather?


Meg O. said...

I love the shout out to my cat! WOO HOO! You're gonna love Dexter. I wish Michael C. Hall would narrate my life. He is amazing.

Unknown said...

ok i have 2 things to say... #1 i know you are going to wear hair flairs in vegas which seems appropriate, how would it look on a stay at home mom? cause im really excited about them and #2... duh tell ur boyfriend all the things yall could buy with splitting the rent and bills! hello!

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