I Think I Just Barfed Cupcake A Little...

We've got problems in this world.

Big, big, big, problems in this mighty world of ours. And ya know what, problems are exactly what this blog--nay, the entire cupcake community--is out to solve through the mass production and consumption of these miniature treats. It's really a social movement, okay!?

I think the first world problem we should set out to tackle is abortion, am I right? It's TOTALLY the first thing that comes to mind when I think of world-problems-that-can-be-cured-with-cupcakes. Totally.

Thank GOD I wasn't the only person that thought so!!! In fact, thank God there was an entire DAY devoted to the mass production and subsequent forced consumption of pro-life cupcakes!!!

Can you believe some people think that women should get a say in the matter?! Hahahahahaha! How very "I don't live under a rock" of them!

I mean, think of it: you make innocent, tasty cupcakes, with messages like "Though Shall not Murder" and "I Heart Babies" scribed in hot pink icing, and force your children who probably can't even read the writing in the icing anyway take them to school and tell their classmates that each cupcake represents a child who will never have a birthday. Can you SERIOUSLY tell me that that DOESN'T make good sense???!! I mean, CAN YOU!?!? *

Anyway, I'm just so glad I stand for a cause that really doesn't have any impact on the way I choose to live my life. Oh wait...did I just say choose??!! OMG, I totally didn't mean to imply that I make choices on a day-to-day basis, because I mean, I totally don't.

Okay, well, I did pick out these shoes today. Okay, and yeah, I did vote in the last election. And sure, I have a say in who I decided to marry...but that doesn't mean you get to choose other stuff about your life in a free and democratic country, okay?! I mean, right?

*Of course you can, because it doesn't make ANY sense.

Editor's Note: Look, you can feel however you want about whatever you want, okay? But don't bring my beautifful, harmless, and very liberal cupcakes into the matter, would ya?