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Tuesday, September 18, 2012

How Are There Not More Nut Flour-Baked-Goods-Related Choking Deaths??

After I graduated from college, I lived by myself for about 3 years. During that time, I developed many neuroses only someone who's lived entirely alone could understand--always check behind the shower curtain before you pee in case a murderer is waiting to kill you...from the bathtub; when walking home late at night, wedge your house key between your fingers so that if someone tries to attack you, you can stab their eyes out Kill Bill style...using merely a key; etc. For some reason, most of my neuroses revolved around being murdered or attacked, but not all of them. The worst and most pervasive of all them became my fear of choking to death in my apartment and being left to rot for god knows how long, since because of my allergies, I don't even have a cat who might eat part of my remains in the wake. 

My fear is fairly irrational, I realize. I've only had one close call with choking and it was during lunch with friends. They didn't even realize I was choking. In retrospect, I might not have been, but that's not the point!! I was pretty sure I was choking, and it was terrifying. So occasionally, when I take an unusually large bite of something or I'm eating alone, I can't help but get that nagging feeling that my food just might not make its way down my throat and successfully into my stomach. I had a similar feeling eating these gluten free, dairy free biscuits this weekend.
Now hold on...I don't mean to suggest these primal biscuits are BAD, per se. Actually they're not. But because they're made with coconut flour and almond flour, they're really really dense, which means you should not eat these on their own. What you should do is smother them in this primal, gluten free, dairy free sausage gravy:
I don't know what's gotten me onto this breakfast kick, but I've been trying to reinvent many of my favorite childhood meals into grain/dairy/sugar free delights. I know I said that I prefer sweet breakfast items last time, but the truth is, that goes entirely out the window when biscuits and gravy enter the picture. My mom would make the lightest, butteriest biscuits (from scratch) and top them with the creamiest, thickest white sausage gravy, a Texas specialty. And while these aren't ever going to replace her biscuits and gravy recipe, it's a pretty damn good substitute for the real thing.
Despite the fact that the biscuits are as dense as they are, the gravy soaks into the biscuit, making them fluffy enough that you don't have to be freaked out about choking, even if you do live alone. It also makes them so SO delicious!
What kind of weird neuroses do you have? Is anyone else as freaked out about choking as me?? And how do you feel about biscuits and gravy??

Primal Biscuits and Gravy
Makes 6 biscuits and lots of gravy
Adapted from Robb Wolf

For the Biscuits
  • 1/2 cup coconut flour
  • 1/4 cup almond flour
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1 1/2 Tbsp cold grass-fed butter (coconut oil is fine)
  • 6 egg whites
  • 1 tsp coconut oil
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper and lightly brush with coconut oil to prevent sticking.
2. Put all dry ingredients into a food processor with butter (or oil) and pulse until butter is the size of peas--the mixture will still be dry.
3. Using a hand mixer, whisk egg whites in a large bowl until frothy, NOT soft peaks.
4. Add flour mixture to egg whites and gently fold until just combined.
5. Using an ice cream scoop, make 6 biscuits (they'll be smaller than a regular biscuit). You might have to flatten the tops with your fingers.
6. Bake for about 15 minutes or until golden brown on top. 

For the Gravy
  • 8-10 oz. country style pork sausage
  • 2 Tbsp arrowroot powder
  • 1 can coconut milk, shaken
  • 1/4 tsp fennel seeds
  • 1 tsp dried, rubbed sage
  • 1/2 tsp pepper
  • 1/4 tsp salt (or more to taste)
1. In a large non stick skillet, brown sausage over medium high heat. Once it's cooked through, remove sausage from pan with a slotted spoon and save for later, leaving the fat and any brown bits in the pan.
2. Turn heat down to medium and add arrowroot powder. Immediately begin whisking arrowroot powder with the fat and continue to whisk for about a minute to prevent burning. The mixture will become very thick. You're making roux (pronounced "roo"), good for you!
3. Add coconut milk, about 1/3 can at a time, whisking milk entirely into arrowroot and fat mixture until entirely incorporated. The mixture will loosen up and then tighten up, but by the time you add all the milk, it will definitely be gravy!
4. Add fennel, sage, pepper, and salt. Taste and adjust seasonings, then add sausage back into the gravy to warm it through before topping biscuits.


9 comments:

  1. I live alone [or with a big big strong man for the creepers out there] and I so agree with your 'precautions'!

    Love breakfast foods, will have to try this. :)

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  2. Ahhhh...an healthier adult version of a childhood favorite! It does look dense, but it also looks delicious and filling. I would definitely eat that. As for choking...the day before you were born I went to a pool party/cook-out with some friends and choked on something so badly that someone "Heimliched" me...maybe you have some deeply repressed memories from the womb?!?!!!

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  3. I have a fear of chocking and I don't even live alone. Also, I need to make this. Because, right now I am starving and this looks like heaven.

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  4. If you're ever in a not primal mood, and want some damn good traditional biscuits, check out Mark Bitman's biscuit recipe. Enjoy being butter drunk for a while afterward.

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  5. I don't think I've ever feared choking. Probably wasn't fed enough as a child. I fear starving to death on a daily basis though. So there's that. WHO knew Rob Wolf catered to such comfort foods? I didn't.

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  6. EVERYTHING WITH ALMOND FLOUR IS LIKE A DENSE LITTLE ROCK. But adding gravy, now that's an idea.

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  7. These look amazing!! Perfect for a weekend brunch! Love Love

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  8. Made these tonight and although the biscuits were a little dense, they had a decent though bland taste. The gravy was really good AFTER I added some extra pork fat to level out the coconut. Also, I replaced the arrowroot with tapioca starch and it worked well. I will have this again but with different biscuits I think.

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  9. The choking issue is hilarious. (and I don't mean that in a mean way at all). I can't wait to try these biscuits. Thanks for the recipe! You're awesome!

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